Thankful.

So I realized that I'm a horrible blogger. I wish I was that type of person who is very diligent in keeping an updated blog, but I'm not. It's always either I don't have anything to say or I have too much to say that I need to keep it to myself. But here goes an epiphany..I'm going to post every single time someone blows me away with their kindness in Korea. Now I know that might sound idiotic, but Korean people really do blow me away with their kindness. People in America aren't THIS nice to strangers, yet alone..a foreigner who doesn't speak their language. Don't get me wrong, I do think American people are friendly..especially Texans. We just have that southern hospitality...but the type of kindness I've experienced here is the type of kindness that does not come naturally to most Westerners. After a few posts..you will see why I feel it's necessary to say these things..plus..there's nothing like being thankful to keep the spirits up and be reminded how blessed we are:

-I have a student that was in my 4th grade class (who I thought was not very fond of me) and is now in my summer class. He's adorable, but I haven't really bonded with him as much as I have with the other kids. As I was gathering my things today after dismissing them...he comes up to me and says "Wendy sim (abbreviation for teacher)" and gives me a can of cold coffee. He actually went and bought me coffee. How crazy awesome is that?! I really hope these kids know how much they mean to me and that they make my day.

-I needed to buy matches because I've been gone for too long from my apartment..therefore my gas range stove has decided that it can fire up on its own. So today, I went to my corner Family Mart to buy some. I awkwardly look around (people staring at me cause I'm a foreigner is something I'll never get use to), but to no avail. Thank goodness for internet access on phones. I quickly typed in "matches" on google images and showed it to the owner. She told me they don't have any then she bent down for what seemed like 2 minutes..found her personal box of matches and just gave them to me. Seriously?!?! Koreans might not think anything of it, but each time someone is kind to me here..it's the equivalent of going above and beyond in America.

--Last, but not least..I thank my Savior for continually putting people in my path who make me want to become a better person. I was really starting to doubt if extending my contract was a mistake, but things like this continually makes me thankful and realize how incredibly blessed I am.

I don't love you, I always will.

I wish you'd hold me when I turn my back
The less I give the more I get back
Oh your hands can heal, your hands can bruise
I don't have a choice but I still choose you
Oh I don't love you but I always will - 'Poison & Wine' The Civil Wars


I really wanted to write this epiphany I had tonight, but I don't think I can sum it up any better than those lyrics. So I'll leave it at that. I'm still hurting over this, but I'm not broken. That's okay right?

The fire's return, I'm letting it burn, there's nothing better in the whole wide world.

I have been in Korea for a little over 5 months now. To say that I am past the newness of it all would be a poor way of putting how comfortable I have become in my "new" surroundings. All this time I have pretty much traveled every single weekend to see what Korea has to offer. All this time I have made the petty excuse that this is all new to me and that the churches around me do not speak English so there wasn't any point in going. A few weeks ago I came to the harsh realization that how is it that I am so willing to travel to all these places in Korea that took up a lot of my time, but I'm so unwilling to find a church that feed my soul spiritually? The last few months, despite of having a great time, I have had a mixture of feelings. Feeling both alive and lost at the same time has been interesting. I am here doing what I thought I would always do..travel and live somewhere to experience a new culture, but I was missing something.

A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with my friend Christian. She was helping me through something that seemed to have been a hard lesson that God gave me. Words cannot express how thankful I am to have her as a friend..who is kind and generous. Willing to give up an hour or two to sit here and talk to me about my problems. I felt blessed and wished that I could be more like her. She sweetly said that it was only because of Jesus that she's like this. It took a few weeks for it to sink in and for me to realize that I am not whole without Jesus. I am not the same person without Him. I have not been a good example of what a Christian should be. I have definitely noticed that my tongue gets the best of me..I do not watch what I say at times when I am too comfortable and that my thoughts need to be guarded. I felt I needed a change again once more. I decided to finally attend a church service at a church that I had researched before coming to Korea.

Sunday morning came around and I woke up a little after 6AM to get ready, got on the 7:57AM train to Suwon. Listened to worship music for the two hour ride. I was feeling optimistic and excited that I will finally get to spend time with my Lord and other believers. I have not been to church in 5 months and I have realized that my soul is lost and ugly without it and without Him. My friend Linda gladly accompanied me, which was a big sacrifice for her, and I am ever so thankful to have a friend that would give up their time to do something that meant a lot to me. We arrived at the station and after finding breakfast, we made our way to the bus stop and nervously made sure I read the directions someone had given me. We waited for a few minutes for the bus, wondering if it would ever get there. I noticed that we had stood next to another foreigner, but after being here for 5 months..you really don't wanna be the awkward "waygook" to start a conversation with another waygook just because you both happened to look foreign. You realize things like this when you've been here a few months. So Linda and I chatted about possibly being late for church and that I was off to a bad start then the foreign said "I'm sorry but I overheard you saying something about church..." ..Her name was Sarah and she was heading to church as well. We were relieved that we wouldn't have to guess when trying to navigate ourselves blind through this town we've never been to. She was very friendly and made me feel more at ease about going to a church in a foreign country. We get to the church and I finally met the person I have been corresponding to on facebook about going to her church. She was as nice and as welcoming as I thought she would be.

There's something about being around Christians that's just contagious for me. It makes my soul truly glad to be around fellow Christians. That's not to say that other people aren't as nice and as welcoming because they are...but being in the fellowship with other Christians just encourages me to be a better person in more ways than one. It just makes me feel at home. I felt relief to be there. I felt at home. I found what I was missing. I felt myself in God's presence and it felt beautiful to be there. I couldn't help but close my eyes and sway myself during worship. I feel blessed and comfortable to be there. The pastor delivered a very condemning message of what it's like to be a disciple and I found myself short. I knew then that without the fellowship of others and without a church that will challenge my spiritual walk that I would be lost. I would be a lukewarm Christian who claimed to be Christian, but whose actions and words do not match what they claimed to have faith in. So with great joy in my heart, I think I can safely say that I have found what I needed the most here in Korea. It's time to stop making pathetic excuses about how the churches are too far, because I have traveled much longer for things that do not really matter. This empty void is finally filled.Praise Jesus for faithfully loving this soul of mine :)

"Do not look at the world through your head; look at it through your heart."    -Eat Pray Love


Wow I really thought I would update a lot more frequently than I have been. Sorry everyone! Everyday brings a new day of craziness in a good way. Things have been different, but great. I wake up daily and cannot believe that this is my life. When I was still in college and working my way through it, I dreamed of living somewhere where I traveled frequently using trains. Welp, here I am. I feel like I am on a constant vacation. During the week I get the privilege to teach children and on the weekends I get to spend my time living out of my backpack. I don't feel like writing this in a normal blog format so I shall give it to you this way:

1. The number one thing that I've been constantly reminded with daily is the fact that if I don't have it with me, I probably don't need it (with the exception of winter coats at the moment). I have realized that I acquired so much crap in the U.S. that I didn't really need, but regardless of that I feel very blessed that I had them anyway.
2. Each time I have to take a train or bus for a major trip I've learned that I am one stop away from being lost, but each time I step on a platform I become less and less concerned about the fact that I do not really speak the language nor can I read their alphabet. I realized a long time ago that I am a foreigner and I will probably spend 90% of my time here feeling lost. Being lost here is an adventure since nothing will ever be familiar.
3. Korea gives you this sense of "The world does not revolve around you and neither does your schedule". I've learned to just go with the flow (for the most part) because your school takes precedence over your own plans.
4. I never feel lonely. Missing certain people? Yes. Lonely? Never. I find myself wanting to just sit in my apartment alone at times in order to just have some peace.
5. I will never get use to getting stared at or having Koreans look at my basket in order to see what I am purchasing.
6. Humility goes a long way and so does smiling and nodding at the same time.
7. When I lived in the Philippines when I was little, I used to wonder why foreigners dressed crappy. Mystery solved. I have become that foreigner. 
8. As much as I try to understand and adapt to the culture, I struggle to keep myself from getting lost in it. I tug and clench to my beliefs and my morals.
9. I am proud to say that I am from Texas.
10. All Korean children are precious until they have a bad day.
11.  I wanted to stop at 10, but I have to say that I miss getting a hug from my mom and dad. 

I will try to update more soon. I think I enjoy writing a blog using the list format so that I don't have to worry about looking illiterate. I think I shall continue to use this format for future blogs :)

Long overdue update from August 28th...

Hello everyone! I had hoped to blog sooner, but training has kept me busy non-stop. I spent the first few weeks in Jochiwon at a satellite campus of Korea University. Even though it was full of training, I still enjoyed it because of the good company. There were about 350 of us training to teach English here in SK.  I have met some great people from all walks of life around the world and have made great friendships. We spent every waking moment together and then some: eating, taking classes, getting lost in subways, noraebang and even as small as going to a Home Plus  (grocery store) for the very first time here. We bonded by experiencing what it’s like to be foreigners together and made great memories. We also got a chance to do an English camp together in Pyeongchang, just west of Seoul. There we spent almost a week with a South Korean child of our very own. It was quite an experience and in my opinion it is a lot harder to teach a child one on and one and try to be sane throughout it. My child was a seven year old boy. I gave him the name Jack-Jack after the baby from Disney’s The Incredibles. He was quite a handful to say the least J.

A day after English camp was finished; all 350 of us were separated to go to our provincial training. Lucky for me there were about 50 people in my group. Unfortunately I can’t really tell you where we went. We weren’t allowed to go off campus for about a week…so basically all I needed to know was that in order to go class (basically from 8:40AM until 8PM) and to the cafeteria that I had to go downhill from our dorms. It was quite a workout since it was very steep! That’s the thing about SK….it’s full of mountains. I never imagined that Korea would have mountains everywhere I turn. Think of Colorado…make all the mountains green and take out all the flat land and you’ve got South Korea.

South Korea is such a beautiful country and it’s definitely a country where I think that people should be proud to say that they are from here. Though the economy is not as wealthy as the United States, it is a country that going full speed towards the future. Little things here and there surprise me when it comes to the technology here:

            Most cell phones have antennas that allow people to watch TV on their phones

My apartment floor has a feature that makes it a heated floor during winter 

The locks are digital depending on where you are (hotels or dorms) and you cannot turn on the lights without putting your keycard on this thing on the wall

All the cars have GPS systems

My classroom has a touch screen that allows me to show movies and make things interactive for my students

Alas, I am currently sitting in my very own apartment. I have been here for 2 whole days now. It’s so weird going from being part of 350 people, then 50, then just down to 1. I have 5 other TaLK program scholars here with me in Boryeong, but since most of us do not have cell phones and internet at the moment, it’s very hard to get in touch with them to find out where they are so we can hang out. I did, however, get the chance to get on facebook on Friday and I spoke to one of the guys in my program and somehow managed to arrange to meet up this morning at the bus terminal to explore the city and find maps and such.  We did that for a couple of hours and though it wasn’t very long, it was nice to see a familiar face in a city of 100,000 people in a foreign country. I also went for a 2 ½ hour walk today around the city just to explore by myself. I tried to go to the beach but it was getting dark and I didn’t know how much further it was going to be down the road. Tomorrow I am planning on taking a cab to the beach and probably just lay around and relax and read a book. Apparently I am only about 10 minutes from the biggest beach in Korea. It’s weird being the foreigner, but it’s quite exciting trying to figure things out on my own.

On another note, I will not have a Korean TaLK scholar at my school of 1,400 students. Instead, my mentor teacher will be helping me with my students. I have got to say that I am very blessed to have a mentor teacher that cares a lot about me even though we just met. She came to speak at my provincial orientation, but I was so sick that I opted out of the last full day and had to be taken to the hospital and she couldn’t find me during our lunch break. I contracted a cold and was coughing so hard that I coughed up some blood, but definitely better now J Apparently everyone goes to the hospital here for anything because it is so inexpensive. My trip to the hospital was fast and it only cost me 15,000 Korean Won---which is about $14 American dollars and another 15,000 for medication.  Mrs. Nam (my mentor) was so sweet that when she found out that I had to go to the hospital, she came to my room when she was done with instructing. She has been nothing short of a very sweet person since the moment I met her. After she picked me up the next day to move to Boryeong, she made sure that her and the other English teacher and their husbands took me to Home Plus so I could get all  the necessities I need for my apartment and even took me out to dinner for my favorite Korean food (sum gyup ssal..sp?). I cannot say enough about her and the other English teacher. They are just such kind people and their English is great even though they don’t think so. I’ve met a lot of people whose second language is English and I don’t think any of them can compare to the level of English of Mrs. Nam and Mrs. Star. I feel that I can be very open with them and can learn so much from them. Some other scholars have mentors that can barely speak English and for me to have a mentor whose English level is quite high is just a blessing.  School starts on August 30^th, but since I picked out a textbook for my students and Mrs. Nam wants to send out a letter to the parents…I will not start teaching until September 6. Until then I will just have to show up to school 3 hours a day to report to my VPs, Principal and mentor and basically surf the internet until 5PM in order to meet my requirement of 15 hours a week.No complaining here J Also, I am only about a 2 minute walk from my school! I was so excited to learn that I was very close to it and to learn that I am about a 5 minute walk from Dunkin Donuts and Baskin Robins and other stores. I think I’m literally in the downtown area so it’s very easy for me to motivated to go walk around and get some exercise.

Anywho, that is it for now. I shall try and post more soon. There’s so much to tell, but I feel like I’ve written quite a lot and I don’t want to bore anyone. Until next time loves…hope things are going great for everyone back home and everywhere else around the world. Oh and if anyone wants to come visit, you all are more than welcome to come and stay with me. Love ya’ll!

P.S. Here is a video tour of my place: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wmBK7_wAbo

Sitting, waiting, wishing...

"How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard."-Author Unknown

As I'm writing this, I'm currently laying in my room (in an egg crate mind you) for the very last time. Moving back in with the parents for a few days before I leave. It seems so unreal that I'm leaving...I'm actually going to do this. For the most part I am excited for what God will bring my way, but I have had a handful of moments where I think to myself, "What the heck am I thinking???".  But alas, there's no turning back. I am always somewhat reluctant to change regardless of my excitement. I have great friends, good family and an amazing church---but I feel as though this is my next step. People ask me all the time if I'm scared about going somewhere where I don't speak the language or know anyone--truth of the matter is, I am more scared to stay here. God has been tugging on my heart to leave my comfort zone and I'm excited to be able to learn more about Him and to be able to lean on Him more to find my purpose in this world. Time to start anew, be closer to God and start living the life that will glorify the One that died for me....I will miss everyone dearly, but I feel that is my time to go and be off on my own and experience new things...new phase of life...it's gonna be crazy good :)  God has been more than faithful to me and everyone else who also have been undeserving...so I think I'm ready...tears will come in the next few days as I say my goodbyes, I'm sure of it. 'Til we meet again my friends...next blog will be written in another country..my new home; South Korea. Future's so bright, I gotta wear shades.

P.S. Please pray that I will find a church home that will challenge me and have opportunities for me to serve in their various ministries.

And here we go...

The greatest inventions and accomplishments began as the flicker of an idea. This tiny flame was then fueled by desire and faith. Watch out for those tiny little ideas. You have the potential to turn them into great things. - Steve Brunkhorst 

Well the journey has officially begun. I received an e-mail in the wee hours and I'm officially working for the Ministry of Education, Science & Technology of Korea. I'm thrilled to start this new chapter in my life, but yet I know that there will be days that will not be easy. But then again when are things ever easy? Better yet...do you ever learn from something that you did not have to work hard and fight for? 

God has definitely blessed me more than any sinner could have ever asked for. I mean WOW. I have family and friends that have been praying for me to go and I definitely cannot believe how much the Lord has blessed me even just in the past year and a half. Each and every single one of you has made me who I am and have encouraged me to do what my heart desires....or at least get one step closer..and I wanna THANK you and say that I love you for that! Anyways that's it for now...Not sure if I will blog before I leave, but I shall try to blog more once I get to Korea.